What do I want to be when I grown up?

Who do you want to be? This is a very difficult question to wrap your head around. There are so many different aspects of yourself, so many rolls to play.

When I was a child, I wanted to be a teacher and a mother. Neither one of those things happened. I wanted to be a successful business woman, well I had more failed businesses than successful ones. I wanted to be influential and respected. I wanted to be powerful and not care what people thought of me. I wanted to be just like Miranda, a successful magazine editor in The Devil Wears Prada movie. Well I am none of those things. I do care what people think of me and it bothers me if I hurt someone's feelings. I do struggle with communication and sometimes find it difficult to have confidence in myself and my ideas. This was a struggle I felt my whole life.

Before deciding who we want to become, we should first understand how we became the person we are today. We have to make sure our thoughts are a product of your own creation not something we have adopted by someone else.

If being a "Miranda" is the only way I can become a successful business woman (for example) then I will never be a successful business woman, because that is not who I am at my core. We have to find a different way to become all that we want to be that aligns with who we are. Here's how to do it.

Sometimes what you don't want to be is equally as important as what you do want. Here's my list.

1. I don't want to be poor and depend on others to survive.

2. I don't want to put others down because I am insecure about myself

3. I don't want to be overweight and unhealthy.

4. I don't want my anxiety of traveling to defeat my desire to see the world.

5. I don't want to be in the same place I am mentally and spiritually a year from now.

Forget titles like mother, father, entrepreneur, boss. Titles or labels are just words. Saying the word "hot," won't make you sweat; just like the word "parent," isn't going to make you one.

Instead use words that describe. Words that make you feel something inside, words that you can attach a positive emotion to. Here's my list.

1. I want to be patient with people and hear them out completely before reacting.

2. I want to be disciplined with my body, understanding it is the only one I get and to respect and care for it.

3. I want to be respectful to money even when I have it, to avoid the times when I don't.

4. I want to be successful in my professional life by loving what I do and working really hard to be my best at it.

5. I want to be loving to my spouse, parents, bros, sisters, nieces, nephews, friends and even strangers.

6. I want to be friendly and humorous to brighten others day with laughter as well as to joke with myself.

7. I want to be influential and inspiring by helping others find their true amazing self.

8. I want to be understanding to all positions. I want to be the person people come to because they know I won't judge them.

9. I want to be committed to my word. If I say I am going to do something, I do it. If I say I'm going to be somewhere, I show up. I follow through, no flaking. I want My Word to mean something.

Take Action. Look for opportunities to put these words into actions.

Notice how empowering and amazing they make you feel. Things that used to be a chore or eye-roll worthy, are now an opportunity to grow and feel great inside. You will start seeing people for the good in them and their faults will be non-existent. When you come into conflicting situation with others it won't bother you like it used to because you will be so aligned in your values that you understand and respect where they are and try not to change it.

Not only will you feel peace within but others will feel your positive energy too. Some will even absorb your new vibes and mimic them. Your partner will notice, your boss will notice, your clients will notice, your kids will notice, your body will notice. Without focusing on labels you will become who you always wanted to be.